Sunday, December 19, 2010

Come and Behold Them.


Tonight, just hours in front of the only total lunar eclipse of the year, in air so cold it will only be described as brittle,


– under the lights of Total Cluster F*ck (TCF) Stadium, the shamefully dilapidated Minnesota Vikings, struggling for the slightest hint of raison d’être...


A team whose season has been lost not only to a woman whose last name spelled backward is Regrets, but also to an egomaniacal sociopath former, back and then gone again wide receiver, and then there was that Mr. Magoo/Mr. Myagi guru or gork of a head coach.


Oh and a team whose stadium collapsed...


During a storm so big that it delayed a game which was moved inside to be played in Detroit free to a crowd of homeless people who had nothing better to do…



Tonight those Minnesota Vikings are set to play host to a post-modern production of a Mid Winter Night’s Dream against the we’re so awesome we’re barely able to keep atop the Division that is at best laughable, ohvur RATED doesn’t even begin to describe it - Chicago Bears.

Monday Night with snow and below zero temps outside in Minneapolis, in a game that win or lose puts a little spoil into the playoff dreams of either the Packers or the Bears?

Absolutely I would pay big league prices to maybe get a seat in a bush league college stadium without booze to watch that.

Throw in a little Joe Webb manning the ship, so to speak…

Well if I didn’t have to work.

In a different city.

I’d hit that. The game I mean.

Not the point.



The point is, I guess I’ll have to sit on my couch under a warm blanket with all the free-flowing booze I want to watch.

Still not the point.
The point is – you should watch it too.

You see tonight's game, more than any other game in a decade, ushers in a new age of Viking football.

Tune in fans. Tune in cynics. Because you’re going to see the real heart and soul of this team, this organization and the very future fate of Viking football in Minnesota.

This is a team in shambles. 


This is a team both literally and figuratively
with nothing left to lose.

When love of the game
is all you’ve got left – it’s bound to get interesting.
                                                                                                                                                                                                       For better or worse – tonight you will behold the Vikings of new.

And if the 2010 season so far is any indication, at the very least, it will be the most talked about story in sports.

                                                                            SKOL.

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